Saturday, July 23, 2011

Shake it up

He stepped out of the bathroom, upper torso naked lower torso shrouded in a purple tower. The steam from the hot shower tried to follow him out and give his emergence into the room a whole WWE feeling. Fan chants and pyrotechnics were cut short by the door being shut and the steam hitting dead wood.

The mirror reflected a dashing young man with a chiseled body, he ruffled his hair - the long locks he had were no longer there. Eyes of the reflection met those of the man. Eyes, genuine surprised eyes. Lost. Lost. Alone. The reflection smiled,mocked and flicked his long hair. He punched it. Broken mirror. Bleeding knuckles. Shocked man, cracked reflection.

Bandaged hand did a full windsor tie. The smile on his face was gone. He buttoned his 3 piece and left the flat. The cute lady who lived opposite his flat was already there, and had punched the elevator button. She smiled at her, a lively genuine smile. He nodded. They didn't know each others name, they never bothered. The smile and nod was a daily weekday ritual. She was the cute lady, he was the broody man. The elevator opened. He motioned her to go first, "ladies first " said a cheeky kid with messy hair to his elder brother in his head, the voice became more distant as he stepped in. "Ping" beeped the elevator and the doors shut the faint memories.

Red digits kept ticking, he kept looking at himself. Still vain still ego centric, no something was slightly different. The eyes weren't just admiring, they were looking for something in the reflection. 29... 10... G. He stepped out motioned a taxi and went to work, looking sharp and corporate.

The black door stood in front of him as the taxi drove off, he buttoned his middle button put on his mask and stepped in. Blue screen, black chair, think , type , call, smile. Repeat. 8 pm, he stepped out, walked back. Borrowed songs, a newly bought blackberry, similar food. Had a chat with the person who served him food, similar nationality. He walked back, coke in hand. Walked among tall buildings, felt small. Was small.

Turned the key, sanctuary of peace awaited him. Laptop, him, semblance of friends and a book . He was agitated today, shut his laptop, changed in to bright yellow shorts. Stole a look in the mirror, he was there again-non bandaged hands taunting. Look away. Avoid conflict. Open door, step out. He grabbed a towel and scampered out. Stepped into the elevator pressed "S". "S for ... " a cheeky teenager smiled to an embarrassed girl. The memory was vivid this time he had to shake it off. "Ping" went the elevator as it touched the S floor. He climbed the stairs to be greeted by calm serenity of blue clarity-aqua. He took off his shirt, dove right in . Peace hit him. Relaxed. Not stressed. Free. Himself. No what was himself. Who was he. Not relaxed. Annoyed. He stepped out he was there again, smiling at him taunting looking at him from the calm of blue that provided him serenity. Veins pumped anger, his eyes narrowed. He stared at him for a while than spat at it and said 'jibe matere picku'. The smile of the other him turned into a smirk. Look and walk away. Better man ?

Or stay and fight. He turned,ran and dived headfirst into the blue. Shattering the other into a thousand tiny ripples. He smiled. He could do that. He could fight back, just like that. But there he was again, back with the smirk. Smiling up at him, matching his every stroke with his own. He went deeper, closer. Until an inch remained to separate them. He willed him to make a move. To leer him. To smirk again. To call the flames always just beneath the surface. The other did not even blink. If anything, he looked pain. His muscles were tightening, his teeth clenching. He was looking more and more like who he really was. A shadow. A ghost. Paling by the second. A bubble escaped his mouth. One crawled out of his nose. And then the chest opened, unleashing the pearls of air trapped within.

It all happened at once. The shadow was flailing, blurring, fading. He had done it. He shut his eyes. For once and for all. Put an end to the smirks, the leers, the nagging the jibes. He could be in peace now. He could be happy. Then why was he suffocating? Was it not the shadow taking its last breath? Then why was his head lighter? Perhaps the loss of the shadow's weight. He opened his eyes. It all happened at once.

He burst the surface, panting. Gasping. A thousand needles piercing his belly, yet he was relieved. He looked around. Did the other make it? The mound on his shoulders was gaining its weight back. He looked around again. His labored breathing was subsiding. Silence. He started his swim back to the edge. With a smile on his face.

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