Small steps

Life should be a sine curve, not straight and boring, it should have it highs and lows makes it more worth living, he proclaimed while absently playing with his unkempt locks. Those around him gave the unkempt boy a look of utter be wilderness. You just did not say that, the pompous girl said while wagging her around. Hey listen, i don't want a boring life ever, but if that's what you want ... I guess it sucks to be you,he shrugged and ran a hand through them shining locks and walked away. What a weirdo, she bitched about him as he walked towards the football field. But he's so yummy, added the girl with cheeks that you just wanted to reach out and all. Puffy you slut get over him, he's not interested in anyone but himself. Argh, you guys I'm just saying ....

A genuine smile remained on his face as he flipped the pages of the album - it was only yesterday he thought. The hair flick was still the same, the locks gone replaced by messy spikes, it looked neat they said, he couldn't be least bothered. Puffy cheeks, she was just cute on the exterior or maybe he was an asshole. Like always he settled for the latter bit. Quick glance in the mirror, a smirk to himself - somethings never changed. Egotistical, self centered and self admiring asshole, perfect he thought maybe he should keep that as his about me on facebook. Had a small laugh at his own expense. Flicked the page.

Come here boy !! The number 16 jogged over to the sideline. Put it in the god damn zone, how difficult is it ? Let your wingers do the rest. The team is losing because of you, pick up your game and stop being so selfish. Like a mirror shattering, his confidence was reduced to finger cutting dust. Anger fueled him on, the knee aches and pains were forgotten. What followed was a blur, the man in a beard and 3 quarters weaved passed two of his team mates, his feet moving at the speed of light. Slow down, Observe, slowdown, observe. He squared him up, wait wait wait - slide. The man in the beard flew into the air, the numero 16 got up and charged to the other side with the ball at his feet, skipped past one, skipped past another he had a clear sight of the goal - switched the ball to his favored foot and before he could pull the trig someone pulled the ground from beneath his feet and tumbling he went to the ground. He got up dusted himself - the coach was barking some orders screaming delta freekick delta freekick, he picked the ball and told the captain its mine. Delta free kickkkkk! He turned to the coach and nodded and chuckled on the inside, like I would fucking know what delta is. 2 short steps, a swing of the boot, a poetic thud of the football connecting to human flesh and watch it curl into the net - he ran to his bench and slide in front of his coach and put his index finger on his lips.

The only private university to qualify for HEC, the voice of the announcer still remained fresh in his ears. His family on the field - brothers in arms willing to take a hit for him. Camaraderie beyond words. As they sipped on hot chocolate in a little cafe in their home town discussing their future, he and his main partner in crime on the field - number 8 - would fondly recall the glory days. They talked about everything and yet nothing, I guess it was a normal conversation between two men nay young adults. Life walked by them as they had the most productive hours of their last 6 months, the only movements involved their talking mouths and them lifting cups.

Both were doing their own thing now - corporate lifestyle and business environment was not conducive to being in contact but they were still each other's boy and nothing could change that. The train of thought was derailed by the elder and huger version of him - bearded face, heart of gold - hey runt he smiled crookedly as the other turned up from memories to face him. We are waiting for you to start dinner. The runt smiled and nodded, will be there in a minute. The huge him left, he tucked the album of memories - flicked his non existent locks, stepped in to flip flops and stepped out of his room. Trust us, the poster with two hammers screamed from the corner, as he turned off light. Trust us - the line he heard his most, disappointments most of them. The light escaping through the crack of the door was blocked - the room turned dark and the poster was lost in the darkness.

Lazily he walked to the dinner table, smile on his face. Not the usual omnipresent mask , human smile, human flesh. The flip flops still grazed the ground, the slouch was no there anymore. Corporate lifestyle. The proud mama looked at him and was glad to have him in her presence. Her eyes reflected love and care, her youngest - all independent and all mature - sharp, non slouchy and proper. The love poured into a smile, baitho beta. His presence had put the chatter to an end. He nodded politely, so what was everyone saying - he tried to resume the chatter. They all smiled back - happy, happy to have him existing in his life.

So the doctor said give him an ultrascopic.. the eldest went off on a roll dropping technical terms like everyone got them. They all nodded at the right moments, showed shock appropriately and made angry faces when required. He sat in the corner - just smiling and observing. The man of the house was pointing in the direction of 3 things and saying that. The elder him was trying to make sure that everyone was getting everyone and he was not getting annoyed, a tough task. The ladies were chatting oblivious to everything. He sat in a corner, observing - he felt it even if for 5 seconds - even if it fluttered away. He knew if just for 5 seconds what happiness was.

God hates us all

- The title is borrowed but apt -

He gasped for air, out of breathe - nay, his throat was choking something inside was giving up. The refresh button was clicked in the hope that somehow what he saw was not the truth. Quick gaze around, all of the rest were immersed in studies - ah yes the mid terms were around the corner. The one in the glasses looked at him and smiled - he politely nodded, stopped himself from breaking the laptop - no violence he thought. Shut the lid of the laptop and walked out of the room and walked into the other. Handed it back to her, looked at her - told her goodbye - resisted the urge to break her. Left, broke himself.

The smoke circle emerged from his mouth and grew bigger, she put her finger through it and destroyed it. A smile crept on her face, not the cute one he remembered but a rather devious one. He was over thinking this, but he did wonder that if the smoke circle resembled a heart ? His thoughts shrugged, in any case he didn't possess one so all was good , right ? As she disappeared into oblivion, the sinister smile stayed back. Oh cruella devil, what a game you played.

Besides her, what else do he like ? the question bounced off humongous white pillars. Sire, upon investigation we found out he doesn't like wine, replied back a meek voice. A huge stick pointed to a human body - so let his liver be, boomed the voice. What does he like ? friends ? - yes sire - shift him into a foreign country, new people new area and shred his confidence while you do that. Hehehe, snickered the meek voiced one, good plan he thought. Sire, I also found out that he dances a lot and loves to play football, proudly proclaims it to be his life. Take it away from him, take his life - the stick fell on a knee. The cracking of the knee was followed by laughter.

The ball rolled perfectly for him, he kicked it with his entire force - something odd happened, he heard an audible snap. Feeling started disappearing from his leg, he gave it quick rub while hobbling . The corner of his eye focused on the gleaming trophy. Fuck this and be a man, his conscience screamed, he limped for 2 seconds and then soldiered on. The feeling in his leg returned like blood rushing back in a sore area - the shining gleaming trophy was won, the cost for the victory was still unknown.

The cute lady smiled and spoke, walk towards with your knees bent. He oddly smiled, a fake one. She knew that too, he was scared. With his knees bent, he took a first step - searing pain, collapsed on the floor. The doctor tried to help him up, he shoved her to the side, pussy his conscience screamed. He staggered back up, tried it again and fell again. Stop please she said, you can't. Handed him a paper and said this is your bible, worship it for the next 20 days. The rest of the conversation is a blur - all he remembers is MRI - Operation - Meniscus - Football never. It ended on a pathetic note, all i want is to be able to play lady. She politely smiled and patted his shoulder.

They fenced, he would keep losing his technique and leaving open gaps but he didn't know when to quit. The majestic one kept on wining and laughing. The other refused to give up - no one could take his life away, or if you could he wasn't going out without a fight.

My Soul Has No Price.

He stood in a line, uncomfortable. Stuck between two near men. He looked around trying to judge his competition. The other two seemed content, comfortable and confident. He shifted his weight, wiped the sweat from his temples; generally a confident arrogant pompous young man, he seemed anything but that at the moment. The pretty boy in front of him fiddled with his coat pockets and pulled out a cigarette, he turned and asked him and the other boy if they had a light on them. They both replied in negative. Non smokers the pretty boy thought, he gave them a smirk and in his head concluded that only real men smoke. He fiddled again in his pocket and after an effort that seemed to last hours produced a lighter from his pockets. He lit up his cigarette and breathed a sigh of relief. The boy in the middle realized he was going to smoke away the tension, he relaxed a little seeking relief in the fact that he wasn't the only one tensed. The pretty boy finally took his first puff and smoked it away while gazing into the distance. It seemed like he was living somewhere far from this place and you could almost be fooled in thinking that this man was a thinker, a soulful thinker. He looked at the pretty boy again, he hadn't thought of him as a thinker. Quite the contrary he thought something was wrong with his eyes, not in vision vise terms but there was something off about them, he just couldn't put his finger down on as to what exactly.

He turned to the one behind him in the line, for the sake of comfort lets call him Daddy's Boy. He though seemed confident on the exterior but a closer look made you realize he was anything but confident. DB(Daddy's Boy) kept on muttering to himself in English, made you slightly uncomfortable. What was DB doing he thought, was he praying ? turning to the lord at this moment of need ? No no, he wasn't praying the mutterings didn't sound like prayers rather they sounded like an interview. Oh so he was pre-planning his interview. Oh DB what a foolish strategy that would be he thought and out came his arrogance yet again. This was the real him. He slouched to his right side and ran a hand through his hair, he was a done deal for this he thought. If nothing works he'll just charm them; this thought came from his flawed opinion of himself. In his own head he was quite the charmer, but sadly only in his own head.

All of a sudden, the air smelt different. No no that can't be right he thought, it was just his head playing games with him. But this smell was really familiar ... it was almost like someone was smoking weed. He took a loud audible sniff to make sure that it wasn't his head playing games. The pretty boy upon hearing the sniff turned and said want a hit ? And extended his joint to both of them. He was yet again declined by both of them and he again met them with the same smirk that said pathetic losers. Pretty boy was smoking up before an important interview he thought , surely this border lined on craziness or was it a mechanism of relaxing himself ? In all honesty it wasn't a method to soothe anything, it spoke volumes about PB. He was always like that, slightly on the edge. He rarely cared about what people will think about him and today was no different. Though did get a lot more weirder when PB decided to sing ghazals out loud. Was it because he was high, no no it couldn't have acted this fast or could it have? He was trying to come to some conclusion of sorts with regards to PB's behavior when it all came to a sudden halt. PB threw the half smoked joint on the ground and just walked off. Leaving the two behind slightly dazed. But if you asked anyone who knew PB, this was to be expected. He always was about himself and never about others. He was a self indulgent young angry man who at the end of the day couldn't care less about responsibility or anything serious. You could bet that he was the type of person who could spend his entire day in front of the mirror.Only one thing was of importance to him, his own desires. These few lines sort of summed him perfectly.

With Pretty Boy out of the picture he realized that the competition was lessened and his odds had definitely risen. But his momentary happiness was shot down by the brute reality, he was the next in line for the interview. He suddenly became very uneasy and felt suffocated in his formal wear. The collar of his dress shirt tighten around his neck, he unbuttoned it to give him breathing space but surprisingly or not so surprisingly it didn't help at all. The breathing problems continued and these problems were to increase ten folds.

He turned to see if DB could tell that he was a nervous wreck but DB seemed preoccupied with his phone and looked almost as panicky as he was if not any more. Who was he calling he thought. Maybe a friend to ask something or his girl so that she could wish her luck or maybe his mom for prayers ? All these questions were answered when DB said " Hello dad." Ah he was talking to his dad, must be seeking advice. DB gave him a suspicious look and lowered his voice. Something didn't seem right, what was DB up to, judging from his discomfort and lowered voice it was obviously that he was up to no good. He strained to catch DB's words and when he overheard him saying " At an interview... Please take care of it for me", his worst fears came true. DB was using his daddy's authority and power to get an underhanded advantage. He gave him a stone cold stare and felt like punching him. It took much restrain not to harm him and only once again in his life will he show so much restrain but that's a story for another time. DB seemed more confident after the phone call, he was smiling with his shiny bright white teeth showing off in all their glory. Oh how i would like to knock those teeth out he thought, he was so angry that he forgot about anxiety and everything that came with it.

He was determined now to win this and only for the sake to wipe that confident broad smile of DB and to show him talent and hard work can overcome anything. A look of desire and determination overtook his face, this was the game face he talked about to everyone when they said he was the self appointed jester of the group. He buttoned up his collar and stood dead straight for the first time since he had arrived here. If this was a Japanese anime you could imagine motivating music playing in the background and him, obviously being the hero, delivering a speech that spoke about his clan values, his worth ethic and his sad childhood. Then jumping in the air and kicking every bad guy's ass before touching the ground. But sadly this wasn't an anime, this was the real world. And the real world is a bitch, that too one with a cruel heart. Determination and hard work takes you far indeed but money can buy anything in this world as was to he find out.

A lady walked out of door right in front of them. He thought she was going to call him for the interview, he quickly recapped his 3 strengths and 3 weaknesses. But what she said took both him and DB completely off guard. She announced out loud that the position that was up for grabs has been filled and they weren't required anymore. But how he wondered, no one gave an interview. He even questioned the lady she just said a good enough candidate came and got it hence the rest of the interviews were not necessary and hurried back in before she could be quizzed again. He hung his head in shame, he was disappointed and broken. DB was equally shocked he was talking on the phone again, presumably with his dad. He kept on shouting on the phone obviously he was as displeased as him. They both were so close but in the end even a millimeter seemed too far. Rumor has it the person selected barely made it through from university, didn't have the necessary interview skills or test skills but what was of importance was the fact that he had a dad well placed in the government. And what was of more importance was the fact that they choose him, he may have loved them or it was his dream thing, but a union is only possible if both parties agree.

It made him doubt himself. He looked into the mirror and thought, was there something wrong with me ?